Why people need a coach

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Published: 1 Jun 2020

Categories
Communication

People need a coach for multiple reasons – but one of the most common is to deal with difficult emotions. Emotions when unvoiced, unheard, become a tangible and every day thing causing anxiety and stress and damage relationships of all types.

Children caught up in this often end up with baggage marked “pre-conditions’ that they carry through their life too and so it continues – the ‘gift’ that doesn’t stop giving.

How can you help yourself?

  • Don’t lose yourself along the way. Keep your hopes and dreams relevant, and in your daily life.
  • Devote your time where you feel it is spent wisely, knowing that one day it will run out, you will be no more, and we never know when that day will come.
  • Fully comprehend that no amount of money you make will ever make up for the things you lost because of it – love, family, respect.
  • Know to stay fully present, in the moment unfolding right before you, right now. That is how you determine where and how your time is spent, and with whom.
  • Try not to be passive, nor an avoider.  Focus on living an authentic life where you see it, and say it. Question with compassion instead of leaving things. These unsaid ‘things’, become injurious over time.
  • Never be afraid to express your love. Unexpressed love for someone is only a shadow relationship.
  • Stay sharp in the everyday workings of your love relationship. Be clever and astute enough to understand what many do not. That the rewards of this ongoing ‘committedness’ prevents a far greater hurt later on, when years are chewed through and spat out, families are split, and wars are waged.
  • Ask for, and look for help when you need it, knowing this does not make you weak – quite the opposite – it shows strength of character.
  • Stay open to challenge, and take feedback in the spirit it has been given, weighing carefully whether to, and how you receive it. Your ego does not control you, you master it with ease and fortitude.
  • Keep the counsel of trusted people in your life who will not betray your confidences and will have your back.

A great coach will not judge, or make assumptions about you. They will also not offer advice. The difference between counselling (past oriented) and coaching (future facing) is significant.

A great coach will instead, help you to explore – asking the right questions, and leading you to identify what is next for you. They will also keep you accountable, and help you to feel fulfilled and inspired with your life.

A great coach will explain to you that you don’t need to fix everything yourself, that you are allowed to express your feelings if you feel pushed out or under-valued.

They will help you reference influences or influencers from your past, without it holding you back from your future. They will enable you to machinate against the unholy trinity – shame, guilt, and worth. Stop procrastinating, whilst reviewing and reflecting before making decisions. Regain confidence, cope with change, and comes to terms with new realities. They will help you become unstuck in areas of your life that you acknowledge you need movement.

You exist as an individual who deserves, and can expect as your birth right to live an exhilarating, and joyful life.

Don’t settle. Ever.