If you’re going to give up anything this week, make it this…………complaining!
Not sure which communication wagon to hitch your pony to this week?
Every week it seems there is new advice on what to do, and what not to do in relationships, leadership, and general communication topics. Complaining is evergreen, and causes the worst damage.
Why? Because it has a negative impact on you – and everyone else.
What can you do if you get cornered by a complainer?
Easy option? Try ‘flipping’ them. Make them accountable by asking them a question that ‘pings’ them, such as “Why would you say that?” This forces self-analysis of their behaviour. If they answered you honestly their answer would sound ridiculous nine times out of ten.
Braver option with a persistent complainer? Say “I’m not willing to listen to that today Marjorie.” (Adding the name is an additional ‘ping’)
If they get smart with you and say, “why not?” Then tell them the truth. “Because it’s mean; probably not true, and brings my energy level down listening to it.”
What will happen? Likely one of these:
You re-educate/re-programme the behaviour, and they know you won’t listen to it in future.
It gives them an emotional ping and makes them think twice before complaining again.
You lose a friend/employee.
Are YOU the complainer?
Let’s get real! No one wants to listen to you. Eventually they will leave you or minimise contact with you.You exhaust people listening to that shit.
Why don’t you channel that energy into saying something nice? If you can’t – then say nothing!
If you believe in a collective global consciousness (and I do) then you understand that this is one way you play your part in the energy field of the planet.
How can you help yourself to stop?
Try to see things you’re complaining about for what they REALLY are:
A minor, and temporary inconvenience?
Someone else’s private business?
Ask yourself if it will matter at the end of the day, and if it will be worth making yourself look like an idiot, raising your blood pressure, or affecting someone else’s energy level?