7 ways to be a better communicator….and you can start today!


Published: 29 Apr 2018

2018 Communication
  1. Understand your own communication – and how that helps or hinders you in your life. If you know you are prone to aggressive, or passive-aggressive behaviour, think about who and what your triggers are. Then be really self-aware and ask yourself who is at ‘fault’ there? Are you taking things too personally? Or is it really happening? Can you ignore it, or do you need to engage or walk away from that situation or person?
  2. Be a better leader – leading by example. Ethical leadership for a modern consciousness. I have two really easy bench marks for understanding if you are an ethical leader – and here they are – 1. Would you like your children to see or hear you treating your staff like that? 2. Would you like to be treated like that, and how would you react?
  3. Be compassionately assertive – it’s new, it’s rocking the world, being recognised by Universities and practitioners – Are you ready? Compassionate assertiveness works on a couple of simple premises. If you see it, you say it, and seek first to understand and then be understood. Compassionately assertive people aren’t manipulated and have a life they want…..but not at the expense of other people. They are honest, authentic communicators. Is that you?
  4. Say what you mean – are you getting your point across, or using ‘invisible’ words and questions? Most people say way too much and add on way too many justifications, opinions, moralisations, and judgements…………and no one cares! You put people off, and detract from your main message when you can’t resist adding on all of those destructive ‘twiddly  bits’. Think about what you want to achieve from the human interaction before you head into it, then don’t say at least 50% of of it, and you won’t go far wrong.
  5. Knock your bad communication habits on the head – bullying, manipulating, drive-by communicating, talking over, ‘twiddly bits’. How do you expect people to interact with you from a safe space, when you make them feel bad? If you have something to tell them, tell them in a way that makes them self-analyse and buy into your viewpoint too. Don’t just chastise, or do revenge statements – it’s childish, and very difficult for people to forget how you made them feel. Use compassionate assertiveness to corrective coach and re-programme mindsets – yours, and theirs
  6. Hold courageous conversations with confidence and get the outcome you need. Without being bold and actually verbalising your fears, concerns etc nothing will ever change, so at some point you have to be brave and bring it up
  7. Seize opportunities and create possibilities in your life – know your next right move. This means staying very present, being mindful, and super observant in your life and interactions with others – in person and online. When we are in peddling/busy mode we miss things. Don’t be a multi-tasker…….be a single tasker, work deep not shallow and watch how much more you attract into your life.


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